Monday, July 25, 2005

Letter to My Dead Mother......

If I could write a letter to my dead mother, which I guess theoretically I could, nothing is stopping me, it would go like this:

Dear Mom,

I am sick of this family. Your two oldest children are the equivalent to the Witches of Eastwick in a bad way. I am sick of Patty telling me things she doesn't remember, selectively, and Debbie, letting her husband brainwash her beyond everything. Dad is coughing up blood, we go see the doc tomorrow, the doc called me Thursday, I called Patty to give her a courtesy call to tell her that we're going tomorrow, and she proceeded to tell me that she doesn't think I should be calling the doc's office to find out what's up with Dad, that the doc should be calling Dad directly, I will totally brief Dad on the situation tomorrow. I am totally pissed about this, because Hello! Dad kept it from us last time for six weeks, I don't want a repeat case of that, that is for sure. She told me that I shouldn't tell Dad anything, I should let the doctor tell Dad because I am not qualified to tell Dad anything. Whatever PATTY. I am just stating the same thing the doc told me. I told her today, I didn't see her pitching in to help out with anything, she doesn't order his medical supplies, or take off to take him to his medical appointments, or deal with his ostomy stuff, or with his DMV stuff, or anything neither does Debbie. They think it may possibly be Cancer again, but they're not for sure, he will have to have an outpatient biospy bronchoscopy, we will find out more tomorrow.

Work is shit. Freida is leaving and so is Danny. I love the company and the benefits, need to stay at the job for the salary and the benefits, so I can take advantage of the benefits and use that 10K in fertility treatment . I am so stressed, with Dad, the new house we're building, the house we need to sell, my full time job and it's 9 million duties, my part time job, and everything else that I feel like I am going to crack. I don't even want to go in tomorrow. I am also having some type of pelvic pain and abnormal discharge.

Gosh Mom, I wish you were still here, I would love to see you again.